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Showing (lesbian) love: the key to relationship happiness

With this relationship advice for lesbians, you will learn new ways to unlock happiness as a couple. "Some couples are married for 10 years, having two children, and wonder why they got married in the first place. They nitpick about almost every little thing, but as a couple they agreed on one thing - they loved their children more than anything." Couple therapists often deal with these stories. What helps if love falls by the wayside, and nobody cares about showing the feelings in the relationship? Take these tips to improve your relationship and build it stronger and happier.


Tip # 1: Words of Affirmation

  • "You are so attractive. I love watching you button up your shirt."

  • "Your confidence is so sexy to me."

  • “Wow. You are so smart. How did I get so lucky?”

  • "I can always count on you."

By words of affirmation, we mean "give compliment" and the reassurance that they are beautiful and appreciated. Compliments are not that difficult. Praise your partner both at home and when other people are around. Be intentional about showing them love in different settings. Pay attention to her/them and make it known how important they are to you. Be genuine and don't expect a compliment or comment in return. Your partner should know that they make you happy and you value them in your life. You don't need a special occasion for that, believe me!


Tip No. 2: Quality Time

Time together should never be missing, even if we live in an age where lack of time is really a big problem, also in love. Have you noticed that in a restaurant, you can usually tell if a couple is on a first or second date or if they are married?

In the early dating phases, people tend to stare at each other, laugh, and talk to each other like no one else is in the room. Couples who have been married for many years sit at the table and don’t talk much or are distracted by their phones. How can you set aside quality time for just the two of you?

If you are married with kids, make sure you take time off from work to go on a family vacation at least once a year, reserving time only for the family. No cell phones and no distractions due to work. Spend this time together. Also, plan a (separate) romantic weekend for just the two of you without friends, without children, without any distractions – just you and her.




Tip # 3: Surprises

Heart shaped balloons

It is not about a ring with a diamond, but about celebrating important days and doing small things to surprise your partner. Do something she/they didn’t ask for just because you know it will make her/them smile. There's so many ways you can show you care about her/them such as

  • Hand write a short love note and leave on the night stand when you leave for work

  • Get a photo from your recent baecation or favorite memory together framed

  • Deliver lunch to her front door and ding dong ditch it

  • Send an unexpected bouquet of flowers delivered to her workplace when she's having a bad week

  • Surprise her at home with breakfast in bed

  • Quietly ordering ice cream delivered by Grubhub when you are watching a movie.

It's the thought that counts. Small surprises can make for a huge smile! The goal is to keep 'em smiling!


Tip # 4: Small Favors

Pouring coffee into a cup

Small favors include buying food on the way home from work, making tea for your sigfig when they are tired or sick. All of this shows you care about them and strengthens your bond with each other. These little things that you do just mean a lot. They are a sign of friendliness, affection, and sensitivity to the partner's needs.


Tip #5: Tenderness / Physical Touch

Two people hugging

Tenderness and closeness are an important part of the “Physical Touch” love language. To show you care about someone with this love language, you should spontaneously hug or kiss your partner. Show them you are there through touch. For example, touch her hand while you are both waiting for your food to arrive at the restaurant. Invite her to snuggle up on the couch after a long week. Hold hands with her when you are walking around the park or even at the mall.



There are so many easy, low effort, affordable ways to show your partner what's up. Send gifts, offer a massage, leave love letters, etc. Do not wait for a special moment to make your significant other feel like they are the luckiest person in the world. Show them you think of them often, care about them more than just a friend and value them in your life. Your small actions will pay dividends in keeping the love alive and relationship healthy.



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